Month: June 2025

Eph 5:21 says, “Submitting yourselves one to another in the fear of Christ.” Submission is the topic of Paul’s focus here. He goes on to say in verse 22: “Wives, submit yourselves, or be subject to your own husbands, as unto the Lord.”


On the issue of “submission” of wives to husbands, Paul underlines the fact that it is their duty to do this, just as it is the duty of all Believers to submit ourselves one to another. Submission is not some random directive, it is given emphasis for a reason.

One basis for this submission is “… As unto the Lord.” Of course, this doesn’t mean that wives should submit themselves unto their husbands in exactly the same way they submit themselves unto the Lord. That would be ridiculous, because the submission of every Believer, male or female, to the Lord Jesus Christ is an absolute one. Our relationship to Him is one of complete, entire, absolute submission. Wives are not exhorted to do that.

What it does mean, is that wives submit themselves to their own husbands, because it is part of their duty to the Lord and an expression of their submission to Him. In other words, they are doing it primarily for the Lord Himself. You are doing it because He expects it of you, and because it honors and pleases Him. The same sentiment is expressed in 1 Cor. 10:31: “Whether ye eat or drink, or whatsoever ye do, do it as unto the Lord.” Everything we do is done to please Christ, done because we know that’s what He would have us do. There can’t be any greater grounds than this, and every Christian wife for whom pleasing the Lord is a PRIMARY concern will have no problem with this.

Further basis for submission: First, “the husband is the head of the wife.” And second, “even as Christ is the Head of the Church and the Savior of the Body.”

This harks back to the order of creation and God’s decree, God’s will regarding this marriage relationship between men and women.

In Genesis 3:16, God said to the woman after she listened to Satan and ate of the forbidden fruit, “… And thy desire shall be to thy husband, and he shall rule over thee.”

Quick note: Paul’s focus here is married women, WIVES, not all women.

Now, notice the constant emphasis placed on the fact that the man was created first, not the woman. Scripture also emphasizes the fact that woman was taken out of man, and was meant to be a “help” that was meet for the man. No animal could supply that need, and so woman was created. Man was created first; man was also made the lord of creation. Man was given authority over animal creation, and man was given the task of naming them.
So principally man was put into a position of leadership and authority. 1 Pet. 3:7 underlines all this, telling husbands to give honour to their wives as unto the “weaker vessel.” This term is not used in a derogatory sense, but is simply saying woman was created different from man (physically speaking, men are naturally stronger than women, were created as such, and are such) and that man must always bear this in mind. In this respect he must not treat her as if she were his equal. He must remember that she is made differently, and he is to respect and honour her. So, the man is to be the head of the wife and the head of the family. God made him that way, and endowed him with the attributes and disposition to enable him fulfil that purpose; and then made woman to “complement” man, to provide what he lacks (the two become “one flesh”). The wife is to help man, support and aid him, and to do everything she can in order to enable him to function as the lord of creation, the position in which God placed him.

This was how it was BEFORE the Fall, when man and woman were still perfect and without sin. That was how God ordained it. Until the Fall. In 1 Tim 2:11-15, Paul highlights the fact that it was the woman who was deceived and fell first, and not the man. And so there was a further consequence of the Fall (Gen 3:16):

“Unto the woman God said, … I will greatly multiply thy sorrow and thy conception. In sorrow thou shalt bring forth thy children…”

We can infer from this that childbirth was to be painless before the Fall.

Furthermore, God said “thy desire shall be to thy husband, and he shall rule over thee.” This not only restates man’s lordship, leadership and headship already established before the Fall, it UNDERLINES it. Woman’s subordination increased by virtue of the Fall. It is arguable that God decreed this because Eve, when confronted the suggestion of the Devil, didn’t consult Adam (which is probably what she had been doing prior to this point), but chose instead to put herself into the position of leadership, and took the decision upon herself. As a result, she fell. Then Adam fell too, dragging the whole of the human race with him in the process. So theoretically, woman, failing to realize her place and responsibilities in the marriage relationship, arrogated power to herself, consequently ushering in a state of disorder and utter confusion. This is the grounds for Paul’s instruction regarding women teaching/preaching and taking authority in church (1 Tim 2). Of course, you’ll hear things like “Paul was undoubtedly a sexist whose views on women mirrored the prevalent attitude then…” and all that. Anyone who makes such statements clearly doesn’t believe the Scriptures as God’s Word. They consider themselves the authority; they know, they understand, better than God. Arguing with people like that is a complete waste of time. The Jews at that time had the scriptures and believed them, and whatever views they held were based off of them. So this was not their view, and it wasn’t Paul’s view either.

“In Him there is no Greek or Jew, circumcised or uncircumcised, barbarian, Scythian, slave, or free person. Instead, the Messiah is all and in all.” (Col. 3:11)

This is Paul pointing out that, in this matter of salvation, men and women are equal.

Paul also talks about the husband’s duty to his wife (in fact, his admonition to husbands takes up more verses than that to wives, and with good reason. I’ll be talking about this next.). He keeps things balanced, always addressing both sides. But Paul bases these instructions on the book of Genesis and the order of creation. He has no agenda of his own; his sole concern is for God’s truth. So writing off Paul’s sayings is a denial of Scripture. When he gives his opinion, he is careful to say so, and when he doesn’t, it is inspired.
2 Peter 3:16 warns that those who twist or distort Paul’s writings and scriptures in general, do so “unto their own destruction.”
All Scripture is God-breathed, yeah? So what Paul writes IS Scripture; his critics are not arguing with Paul, they are arguing with God.

In conclusion, the wife is to be subject to her husband (not to be his slave). She is not inferior to her husband. But a wife should not seek to usurp the place, the position and the authority given to her husband by God Himself. God has ordained this, and the wife should rejoice in her position as mother, as the helper of her man, as the one to whom he can speak and look to for comfort and encouragement, a helper perfectly suited for him. Together, they live to the glory of God and the Lord Jesus Christ.